COMPETITORS

CHRIS BROADBENT

Portugal-based tax-exile. In 2006 became the first reigning Goat to take the title. Bunty used to be a complete no-hoper, but honing his game on the fairways of Vale do Lobo has clearly paid dividends. But if we all played as much as him, we'd be better too. Once stepped in as emergency bookmaker and nearly had to sell his house. How did he make his money? Isn't life unfair?

 

HANDICAP - 8

HOME CLUB - Vale do Lobo

E-MAIL ADDRESS - ladyroyd@mail.telepac.pt

PETER BUTLER

Chartered surveyor, property magnate and former goat. Gives the lie to the common belief that "nice guys come second". Doesn't even come second. Spent much of the last decade on the Wilcox treatment table, which explains everything.

 

HANDICAP - 15

CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS - peter.butler@bramleys1.co.uk

 

JOHN DRAKE

Self employed Johnny Miller lookalike. All too rarely plays like him, but Duck is still one of the Goldthorpe's proper golfers. Only regular to use a broom handle putter, though not always successfully. Slowest eater on tour; if there were prizes for finishing last, he'd win every time.

 

HANDICAP - 7

CLUB - Lightcliffe

E-MAIL ADDRESS - johndrake@hotmail.co.uk

 








CHRIS DURRANS

Shy and retiring member of the Durrans blacking dynasty. If political incorrectness was an Olympic sport, he'd be knighted by now. Reckons he's a proper golfer, but the stats tell the real story. Challenge regularly falters in the caravan park off the 11th tee.

HANDICAP - 14

CLUBS - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL -

cfdurrans@durrans.co.uk

 



MIKE DYSON  

Raghead banker. Emigrated to Dubai January 2007. Unlike Rupert Shires (see below) small stature belies length off tee. Member at Lytham, so everyone likes him. We'll like him even more when he's a member of The Emirates GC.

 

HANDICAP -

CLUBS - Huddersfield, Royal Lytham & St Annes

E-MAIL ADDRESS - mikedyson.dubai@hotmail.com

  





 

CHARLIE KAYE

Used to be an occasional tourist due to responsibilities as captain of industry, which meant he was more often to be found in China and Spain than Silloth. But not any more! Retired in 2007, and though he's still keeping his hand in as a consultant, his handicap will no doubt decrease rapidly.

 

HANDICAP - 18

CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS -  charlesmkaye@hotmail.co.uk

 

 JOHN LIDDIMENT

Chartered Surveyor & former champion. Main claim to fame is finding the front door of Silloth Stores off the 18th tee. Liddy's ambition is to draw the ball - just once will do. Despite boyish good looks, he's one of the older - and more sensible members - of the party.

 

HANDICAP - 19

HOME CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS -jolidd@aol.com

 

 





JOHN NEWHILL

Percy was a regular competitor in pre-Silloth days, but has only played once since the Salver re-located to the banks of the Solway Firth. Reckons he was too old to tour - but just look at the rest of us.

 

 





MARK NICHOLSON

Banker, organiser of the Goldthorpe Salver since Sambo gave up the job, and reigning Goat. Friend and confidant of the Private Tellies. Organised and efficient, which is more than can be said of his golf. Mental block about woods doesn't help, otherwise he'd be a complete bandit.  

 

HANDICAP - 22

HOME CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS - marktownfan1@btinternet.com

 

 

 





CHRIS SAMPSON

Ex-Belgian and first organiser of the Goldthorpe. Continental influence clearly seen in his haircut. Sambo used to be a proper golfer, but time and an expanding waistline have taken their toll. Horrid sight in shorts. Nevertheless a popular winner in 2005. If only he could putt.

 

HANDICAP - 13

HOME CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS -chris.sampson2@btopenworld.com

 

 

 





JOHN SHIRES

Oft-injured media megastar, with second shortest swing on tour. Multiple winner of Goldthorpe, but only once (actually twice - ed) at Silloth, which suggests lack of stamina, fragile temperament, or lack of ability - or all three. Former World Flomball Champion.

 

HANDICAP - 12

CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS - john.shires@itv.com

                                johnshires@blueyonder.co.uk

 
RUPERT SHIRES

Former textile giant, now business consultant. Rookie in 2006 - how did he avoid it for so long? Unlike Mike Dyson (see above) small stature doesn't belie length off the tee. Hits it like a lady.

 

HANDICAP - 19

CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS - r-eshires@badgerhey.wanadoo.co.uk

 




TIM SUGDEN

Tim's death in February 2008 not only robbed us of a captain of industry and a snappy dresser, but also of the Goldthorpe Salver's specialist bookmaker. Suggy ran the book every year bar one (see Bunty above) and reputedly always broke even. Better bookie than golfer; his accountancy qualifications came in handy too when counting up his medal score. Favourite place on the course: that little tree just in front of the 18th tee.

 

HANDICAP - 21

CLUB - Huddersfield

 





ANDREW SUGDEN

Solicitor. Long, languid and elegant….….are three words not associated with his swing. Blink and you miss it. Nevertheless off his handicap he can be dangerous……to wildlife in the heather in front of the 1st tee. The roommate everyone wants to avoid. Sleeps anywhere and everywhere apart from his bed.

HANDICAP - 25

CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS - andrewsugden@eatonsmith.co.uk

STEVE SUTCLIFFE

Accountant who rivals Sugden W.A. with his ability to take a nap anytime, anywhere. Multiple goat. Driving not his strong suit....on or off the course. Owes his continuing participation in the Salver to a passing motorist, the Cumbrian Fire, Rescue and Ambulance Services, and Carlisle General Hospital.

 

HANDICAP -

CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS -stephen@sutcliffeandco.fsnet.co.uk

ROGER THOMAS

Rookie in 2008. Unique amongst Goldthorpe Salver competitors in that he's teetotal, but that didn't do him much good in his only appearance so far. However, he has the potential to be a bandit, which is ironic considering he's a judge.

HANDICAP - 19 (unofficial)
CLUB - Unattached
E-MAIL ADDRESS -  

CHARLES WEBB

Corporate hospitality executive. Undoubtedly the tour's top golfer, but thankfully has more humility than his brother, so we're not constantly reminded about it. However, golfing ability doesn't excuse his dress sense; once turned up to Silloth in Rupert Bear plus twos. Other distinguishing features: very red face when pissed.

HANDICAP - 2

CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS - charleswebb@mobileemail.vodafone.net  
                                          Charleswebb@sellershospitality.com


 





MIKE WEBB
Webby possesses a classic swing (see picture), and an inflated opinion of his own ability. Always finds his own ball, but never anyone else's (well, he never even looks). Loquacious solicitor and former Fixby captain renowned for his modest victory speeches.  Specialist subject: battleships of the Second World War. Big ears and nose. 

 

HANDICAP - 8

HOME CLUB - Huddersfield

E-MAIL ADDRESS - michaelwebb@eatonsmith.co.uk

 

 

 




RICHARD WHITELEY 

The Goldthorpe's Ron Atkinson. Non-playing Jock-hating purveyor of dodgy computers. Frank is the archetypal grumpy old man with strident opinions on everything and everyone - especially the Scots. Why does he live there?

 

HANDICAP - N/A

CLUB - Unattached

E-MAIL ADDRESS - rw@userfriendlyltd.co.uk
                               randcwhiteley@tiscali.co.uk
 

MARK WILCOX

Osteopath, former champion, multiple Goat, and madman. Knows his best chance of winning again is in a reduced field, but attempts to nobble the opposition on the treatment table have so far proved unsuccessful. Madness finally confirmed in 2006 when he suggested relocating the Goldthorpe to Iceland.

 

HANDICAP - 15 & rising

HOME CLUB - Woodsome Hall

E-MAIL ADDRESS - marklwilcox@btinternet.com